Freak Out
by 2queens1prince
Summary: From the drabble prompt "Could you be happy here, with me?" A take on Henry's freak out and the three day break up.


AN: This story started out as a drabble prompt, but once i saw where it was going, it lent itself to a one shot, so here you go.

Prompt: Could you be happy, here, with me?

Living on a military base was about as blah as blah could get as far as Elizabeth Adams was concerned. She had come out to California to spend the summer between her junior and senior year with her boyfriend, Henry McCord. She greatly misjudged what it would be like.

Naively, Elizabeth thought that it would be a lot like college, when she practically moved into Henry's off campus apartment. She didn't officially live there, but she spent most nights there and had a fair share of her belongings tucked in random places among his things. Henry came home after class and they hung out, watching TV, playing Scrabble or doing work for their classes right next to each other, her head on his shoulder, reading her book.

It was nothing like that now. Henry was up before sunrise and often came home after 7 pm exhausted. He'd shower and she'd fix a simple meal of mac and cheese, sandwiches or frozen pizza. She had tried to cook a few things, but that hadn't worked out the best, so she stuck to things she knew she wouldn't burn. He would eat, barely speaking to her and then he'd fall into bed, asleep before his head hit the pillow.

It wasn't that she faulted him necessarily. She completely understood why he would be worn out, but she was upset that she got to spend hardly any meaningful time with him at all. And she had nothing meaningful to do.

That's how she came to be sitting on the front porch step at 3 am. The neighbor's dog came trotting over looking for some attention."Hey there, little friend. What are you doing out here in the middle of the night?" She rubbed his head and he curled up at her feet. Mindlessly she stroked the dog's back while she thought about her predicament. She was desperately lonely even though Henry was right there. It was frightening to think that this is what the future would look like.

Elizabeth thought that she would just work odd jobs and follow Henry around from base to base while he fulfilled his military obligation. Then she would start her career and they would begin their life together. She had only been out here three weeks and it felt like an eternity. The thought of doing it for several years made her stomach turn.

Henry watched her from the door. He saw how quiet she'd become, how defeated she looked when he came home so exhausted that he chose sleeping instead of spending time with her. It pained him, but this was his life now. "Hey," he said softly as he stepped out onto the porch.

"Hey." She gave him a slight smile. He scooted in behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder. "You should be sleeping," she said.

"I don't want to be sleeping," he whispered in her ear. He moved his thumb under the hem of her t-shirt, brushing her bare skin, while his fingers massaged the inside of her thigh sneaking them under the edge of her shorts.

Elizabeth shook her head. "No, Henry. I don't want to. Not tonight." His hand stilled, but he didn't move it.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked, his head still resting on her shoulder.

"No. I'm frustrated at this whole situation and I miss you."

"I'm trying to rectify that," he murmured, kissing the shell of her ear, his fingers inching closer to her center.

"Stop it, Henry." Elizabeth pulled away from him and stood. "It's not about sex. It's about you doing what you need to be doing here and me having no place." She slumped down on the step next to him. "This isn't what I thought it would be." She looked over at him. "I'm sorry."

Henry felt the air leaving his lungs. "I don't have the option of quitting."

"I know," she whispered.

"Could you be happy, here, with me?" he asked.

Elizabeth rubbed her hands up and down her thighs while she tried to come up with a reasonable answer to that. "If you were actually here with me. Yeah, I could be happy. I would be happy. But you aren't with me. You are a Marine. You belong to them right now."

"What are you saying?" Henry asked. Elizabeth could feel the pain in his hushed tone.

"I'm saying I can't stay here. At least not long term."

"So that's it then, I guess." Elizabeth turned to see Henry rise from his spot and go into the house.

Elizabeth wrinkled her face in confusion. She followed him inside. "So that's what?" she asked, then she saw what he was doing. "Where are you going?"

Henry threw the last of his things into his duffle and grabbed his flight suit and fatigues from where they were hanging on the closet door. "I can't just hang around here and watch you leave. It's obvious this isn't going to work, so I'll give you a few days to get your things together and you can go back home."

"What the hell, Henry? I'm not breaking up with you just because I don't want to stay away from literally everything I've ever known and do it by myself."

"No. I'm breaking up with you because I'd never expect you to do that. I've got another six years. I won't make you wait that long." Elizabeth stood there stunned as Henry leaned in and kissed her, his tears wetting her cheek, and then he turned and walked out the door.

It was a good ten minutes before Elizabeth could even move and then she crumpled to the bed and cried. She had no idea what just happened. Henry was never one to make snap decisions. Quite the opposite, Henry would talk things to death, to the point that Elizabeth wanted to strangle him. Had he been looking for a reason to ditch her? She couldn't even process that. Dragging herself to the middle of the bed, she closed her eyes and let the tears fall again.

Elizabeth's eyes slowly opened and she glanced at the clock. Noon. She went to the bathroom and brushed her teeth. She stepped back into the bedroom and saw Henry's dresser with the drawers slightly ajar and his duffle was conspicuously missing from the corner of the room. Everything came flooding back. It hadn't been a dream. Henry broke up with her.

She let out a shuddering breath, then shook her head. That wasn't going to happen. Elizabeth moved to the bed and made it. She straightened the room, pushing the drawers in and then she moved to the bathroom. She systematically cleaned the tiny home, moving from room to room dusting, vacuuming and tidying until everything was perfect. Checking her watch, it was just after 5.

Elizabeth showered and put on Henry's favorite strapless dress. When Henry got home, they would sit down and talk about it. They'd make a plan and work everything out. She nodded. Yes, that's what they would do. She set the table, complete with wine glasses, and put candles out in the middle of the the table. Pulling the frozen lasagna from the freezer, she placed it on the counter to thaw. Everything was ready. She just had to wait until Henry came home.

Elizabeth waited. Seven o'clock came and went. At eight o'clock she went to sit on the step. The neighbor's dog moseyed up to brush against her leg. "He just gotten held up," she said to the dog, and even nodded to assure herself. With each minute that passed, Elizabeth started to lose hope. It was after ten when she finally gave up and went in. Henry wasn't coming home. He wasn't coming back to her. She pulled herself from the step and trudged inside.

Tears pricked her eyes as she pulled the candles from their holders and placed them back into the drawer. She pushed the lasagna off the counter into the trash can and put the wine glasses away. She crossed the room and stood in the doorway looking at the bed. Their bed. Elizabeth wondered how she could find him. She knew he wouldn't leave base. He had flight training every day. He couldn't miss. But she couldn't just start showing up places and take the chance on getting Henry in trouble. She was stuck.

Stepping out of the dress, Elizabeth hung it back up. She swallowed hard. This was it. Henry really had broken up with her. Elizabeth was so angry with herself. She had sworn she would never give her heart away again. Henry told her that she could trust him. He would always show up for her. And yet, Elizabeth stood in the middle of the bedroom they shared and she was alone again. She climbed into bed and tears fell, soaking the pillow.

Henry pulled away from his tiny base house around 4 am. He didn't need to report until close to 6, but he needed to escape. He parked and sat in the lot thinking about what he had just done. Elizabeth needed a way out and he gave it to her. She wasn't cut out for the military life. She was finding that out. It wasn't fair of him to expect her to wait for him. She would get tired of waiting and she would find someone else and get on with her life. Even thinking that tore his heart wide open. He loved Elizabeth more than anyone in the world. She was his everything. But that's why he had to send her away.

All day he fought to act normal. He conducted his pre flight test almost robotically. He flew and performed every maneuver required of him. He was flawless, but the spark was gone. He was in the locker room changing into street clothes when he was flanked by two of his best friends, Jeff and Steve. They sat down on either side of him and waited. "What?" he asked.

"Something's wrong," Jeff said.

"I'm fine," Henry responded.

"You had a fight with Elizabeth?" Steve guessed.

"No. Can I crash on your couch?" he asked.

"So you did have a fight then," Steve argued.

"We broke up." Henry rubbed his hand over his face. "She's unhappy here, and wants to go home, so she's packing and going home."

Jeff looked like he'd been slapped. "So you broke up? What the hell, McCord? You're a dumb fuck. There's a thing called a long distance relationship. It's where two people who love each other to the point of being gag worthy aren't physically together, but are still a couple and see each other when they can. You may want to look into it."

"I don't really want your opinion, Jeff. Steve, can I sleep on your couch?"

"You can use my couch, but I agree with Jeff. Has she already left? You need to go back and talk to her."

"She probably already gone. I just can't stay there right now. She needs to go, anyway."

Henry struggled through the next day and crashed on Steve's couch a second night. He was finishing up the following day when Jeff came running into the hangar. "You're going home tonight, McCord. Elizabeth is still there. She didn't leave. You have to go and make things right."

"What? How do you know?" Henry found that he was both ecstatic and scared beyond belief.

"I just happened to drive by and she was sitting on the porch," Jeff said. "You're going home tonight and fixing your shit."

"Yeah. I want my couch back," Steve agreed.

An hour later, Henry parked in front of the little house. A velvet bag from the jewelry store in town lay on the seat next to him. He wasn't sure this was the right thing to do. He only knew that he didn't ever want to spend another night not knowing where they stood. Henry had such conflicting feelings that he wasn't sure he could vocalize them.

He loved Elizabeth so much that the thought of her not being in his life literally made it hard to breathe. But, at the same time, seeing her unhappy because of him was unacceptable too. He thought that if she had to be away from him, she shouldn't have to just wait around. She should be able to move on with her life. He was scared to be without her yet feared that she would grow to resent him if she stayed. He sighed. This wasn't going to get any easier.

Grabbing the bag from the seat, he rushed out of the car and up the walk so he didn't lose his nerve. The door was unlocked and he walked inside. The blinds were pulled, dimming the front room, giving it the appearance of being late in the evening. He made his way to the bedroom and the sight of her caused a lump to form in his throat, making it hard to breathe and impossible to swallow. She was curled up in the middle of the bed giving in to a shuddering breath every few seconds.

He moved to the bed and sat down on the edge. "Babe?" He gently reached out to touch her shoulder. She startled and pushed herself up quickly.

"Oh, I'm sorry I'm still here. My flight doesn't leave until tomorrow. I should've called yesterday, but I-well I didn't. Let me finish packing up and I'll call a cab." She hurried into the bathroom and flipped the lock. She took a deep breath trying to clear her mind enough to function. Elizabeth moved to the sink with the intention of applying makeup, but she quickly realized that she wasn't going to be able to accomplish much with tears on the brink of falling.

There was a knock at the door, but she ignored it, putting the last of her toiletries into her travel case. Quickly splashing water on her face, Elizabeth studied herself while she dried off. She looked like she'd aged thirty years in the past three days. Another deep breath. She would do this. She'd lived through loss before. She would do it again, but she'd be damned if she ever let herself love again.

Elizabeth stepped to the door, unlocked it and pulled it open quickly, hoping to get this over with. Henry had been leaning against the door plotting what he was going to say and nearly fell on top of her. They were both shocked and it was Henry that came to his senses first.

"Please don't go. We need to talk."

"We needed to talk two days ago. Now it's just time for me to leave." Voicing those words put a realness on the situation that Elizabeth hadn't understood. She was leaving Henry, for good. The ache in her chest was unbearable, but she clenched her teeth and moved around Henry, picked up her suitcases and set them down near the door. Picking up the phone, she dialed information and asked to be connected to the cab company.

Henry watched her make the call and wondered how things could go so wrong. She was really leaving and he was going to have to watch her go, which was the one thing he didn't want to do most of all.

She hung up the phone. "It will be thirty minutes. I'm going to wait outside." Picking up her suitcases, she wrestled them out the door and sat down on the porch to wait. The dog immediately trotted over and wiggled his head under her hand so she would pet him. "Little friend, this is it. It's not how I thought things would go, but it is what it is." She absent mindedly rubbed the dog's back and closed her eyes.

Henry stood in the doorway and tried to unscramble his thoughts. He knew he had only one shot at making this right and even that wasn't a very good one. He moved to kneel in front of her. She sat with her eyes closed, tears seeping from the corners, running quickly down the well worn trails made by the tears shed before.

"Elizabeth," he sighed and took a deep breath, forcing the words out of his mouth. "I was selfish and wrong and scared. I broke up with you telling myself that if you were going to back home, I didn't want you to have to wait for me, but I wasn't being honest-even with myself. I thought that if you left, you would find someone else and that terrifies me because I love you so much. And I know that doesn't even really make sense when I say it out loud. But I love you more than you could possibly ever imagine and I'm scared to do this without you and I'm scared I'll lose you."

Elizabeth's head remained down, her tears now dripping on Henry's hands as he took hers. "Please forgive me. I was stupid and I don't want you to leave like this." Finally, she looked up at him.

"You leaving really hurt me. It was like I lost them all over again," she whispered. Henry saw the devastation on Elizabeth's face. "I thought you just needed some space and you'd come back, and then you didn't, Henry. You didn't come home."

He pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight. "I didn't think. I should've known, but I was all wrapped up in myself."

She pulled away. "I love you,Henry, but I don't think I can fight like this. If you are going to walk away every time we are in a tough spot, I-I just can't. The past three days have been hell."

"It won't ever happen again. I promise."

"How can I know that, Henry? I didn't think it would ever happen and it just did." Elizabeth looked at him intently.

"Because." Henry stopped. "Wait a second. Stay right here." He stood. "Don't go anywhere. Please."

Henry let go of her hand and dashed into the house, picking up the velvet bag off the couch. He dumped the ring box out into his hand and rushed back outside and knelt in front of Elizabeth.

"I know that I have royally messed this up, but I love you more than I ever dreamed I could love anyone. I don't want to live my life without you. I'm not sure what that will look like, but I know we'll figure it out. I will never leave again. I promise you. Will you marry me?"

Elizabeth's mouth fell open. "What?"

Henry looked a little less sure. "I asked if you would marry me."

"Are you out of your mind?" Her eyes flashed with fury. "I am waiting for a cab to the me to the airport so I can go home because you broke up with me. Do you even get that, Henry? YOU BROKE UP WITH ME!!!" She scooted back and stood, leaving him kneeling on the sidewalk.

Henry pulled to his feet, and moved to stand close to her. He took her hand. She tried pulling it away, but he held it firmly. "I fucked up. Badly. I know. But I don't want you to leave. I want to fix this. I want us to be together as long as we live because that's the way it's supposed to be. That's the way it would be if I hadn't screwed up. Let me fix it. Please, Elizabeth. Don't leave. Let's work through it. I'm ready now. I'm sorry I wasn't ready three days ago and dear God, I'm so sorry I hurt you." He paused and took a breath. "Please?" He let go of her hand and took a step back. Elizabeth looked up at Henry, his eyes were full of tears and she could see he was genuine. Seeing the love in his eyes and also the pain there affirmed her love for him.

She nodded. "This is nuts, and I'm crazy, but yes, I'll stay and yes, I'll marry you." Henry broke out into a wide smile. He picked her up off her feet and swung her around. "Don't think because I said yes that everything is just fine and dandy, because it's not. We have a lot to talk about and work out."

The horn sounded from the street and both looked over to see the cab sitting there. "I can send him away, right?" She nodded and Henry ran down the sidewalk and handed the driver some money for his trouble. Elizabeth lugged her suitcases inside and Henry met her at the door. He brushed the stray hairs away from her face and tucked them behind her ear.

"I've kind of messed everything up, but I really want to do this one thing right. So bear with me okay?" Elizabeth nodded, slightly confused. Henry stepped back and got down on one knee.. "Elizabeth Adams, I love you with all my heart. I know there will be times when I mess up, but I don't ever want you to doubt my love and my commitment to you, to this relationship. Will you marry me?"

Henry took the ring from the box and slipped it on her finger. She gave him a watery smile. "Yes, Henry McCord, I'll marry you." She pulled him to his feet. His lips landed on hers and he kissed her tenderly. "Let's go to bed. It's late." They undressed in silence and crawled in bed and moved together, tangling their limbs, her head on his chest. Minutes passed and she felt Henry relax beneath her. "I like my ring. It's beautiful. When did you find time to go shopping?"

"I picked it out before you got here and I've been making payments on it. I just went in and paid it off today."

Elizabeth tilted her head to look up at Henry. "You had already picked out a ring? And you still broke up with me?"

"I know. I freaked out, alright! It was so dumb and I'm just sorry I hurt you. I'll make it up to you, I promise." Henry pulled her in closer and kissed the top of her head. Within a minute, he was asleep. Elizabeth rolled over and Henry followed, catching her fingers in his and drawing them to her heart. "Never letting you go," he mumbled in his sleep.

Elizabeth released the tension she'd been holding since she arrived. "Never," she murmured, and her eyes fell closed.


End file.
